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About Deviant Member CorvalianMale/United States Groups :iconifedmycatsdogfood: IFedMyCatsDogFood
We Have All The Llama porn on DA
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Journal Entry: Wed Mar 26, 2014, 10:57 PM
So I got to thinking the other day about people on Deviantart who do a lot of blocking. Like if your block list is enormous, and I mean like so enormous that you have people on there from shit that happened years ago that you can't even remember. Would you just be constantly bewildered by all the things you can't reply to?

For example, you come across someone's comment, want to leave a reply, but find yourself unable to because you appear to be blocked. You have no idea what you did to offend this person, and all you can do is go on with your day. In actuality though, it's you who blocked them, you've forgotten about it, and due to Deviantart's mechanic of "blockers cannot harass those that they've blocked" (which is a good mechanic, by the way) you end up thinking that they've blocked you for something. I wonder how often this occurs, especially since they've allowed name changes on the site.

I myself have kept it simple over the years. That's right, I'm taking pride in my blank block list. I mean, it's just so beautiful and clean, but mostly it keeps things simple for me. If I can't write a reply on someone's page, I know it's they who became butthurt over something, not me.

However, despite the advantages of having a clean slate, it is still not impervious to some degree of frustration and confusion. For you see, one may still encounter individuals who have blocked him without being able to recall the reason.

I have a confession to make. That is, I am not unlike the Seinfeld character, George Costanza. I must be liked! Or at least, told why I'm not liked. After stumbling across a few users recently who have me blocked and having only speculations as to the reason(s) why, I've decided to start keeping a list.

Now I am aware of the dangers of publishing such a list for all to see, let alone "mentioning" the names of those who have blocked me. To those concerns I say 'tis not a list of shame, nor a list of pride. It is just a list, and if answers come or do not come, so be it! Can differences not be resolved? Can pasts not be buried? Can mysteries not be solved?

Uh, I also probably won't be publishing the list more than once, or at least not again for a long time. So don't get any fancy ideas about getting featured in my journal (for whatever that's worth... nothing btw) if you block me. Smartasses.

So without much further ado, to date, I believe there are only five individuals who have blocked me:

-TrueSoprano - for preaching to her too much about the band, Killswitch Engage.

-sbkMulletMan - for laughing at his insults that I legitimately thought were jokes. I mean they were really, really funny from what I remember. I thought he was being like one of those old, Irish bartenders who calls you a pussy for not drinking their best whiskey, but who actually is glad you're there and appreciates your business. I misread the situation... and I may have been drinking whiskey.

-Danium - for writing daily insults on her page to see if she would respond. I... may have actually deserved this one.

-Vaporeon249 - I think the BHB (Butthurt Brigade, a now defunct Deviantart group) wrote a journal about something she did (I can't remember what it was now), and some people went over there to call her out on it. At which point I believe she pre-emptively blocked the entire group if I remember correctly, myself included. This is largely speculation though as I don't remember much, or if I ever even knew.

-Xadrea - I honestly can't remember or even imagine what it was, and that's what pisses me off. EDIT: I've been informed that this person also may have blocked everyone in the entire BHB at one point. After doing some internet searching of my own, this appears to be the most likely reason for this block.

-kurostarSunny - Was digging through some old journals from back when I had that fake enemies list going, noticed this person in the "real enemies" section who still has me blocked. I can't recall what I did, but since they were on my list, I don't think it was the result of a BHB block.

EDIT(4/22/14):Added KurostarSunny.

  • Mood: Content
  • Listening to: Chevelle - Take Out the Gunman
  • Reading: ASoIaF - A Clash of Kings
  • Watching: Game of Thrones trailers
  • Playing: Titanfall (as my computer allows)
  • Eating: raviolis!
  • Drinking: nothing alcoholic, I swear


Corvalian's Profile Picture
United States


Starfire by Trichardsen

This is a hard one for me to critique because I'm not a photographer, and there aren't enough elements under your control in this type ...

I'm not sleepy!! by cheslah
by cheslah

This looks like some professional grade work to me. I'm not a photographer, but from what I do know I can't really find anything wrong....


I find the pastrami to be the most sensual of all the salted, cured meats.
I blame Red Bull, first and foremost, since they're the first bastards I can remember who insisted on fitting their drink into a thin, weird-ass can, like a bunch of hipsters.

Now everyone's doing it. It's like standards for making things fit cup holders just went out the window for no apparent reason. We've got plastic bottles that are too thick on the bottom, water bottles that are too tall to go under my car's console (where the cup holders are), and shit that's too thin to remain stabilized at all. What happened to just going into a 7-11 and getting a drink that fucking fits, that way you can comfortably drive off without having to hold it?

This is why people still drink soda so much, because you can get it in sizes that are goddamn convenient. Well okay, that's probably not the only reason, but I'd try harder to drink other stuff it would fit!

:iconindigodeerplz::iconsaysplz:beverage containers force you to hold them now.

Boring Shit: I wanted to vent my complaint before leaving for a class, and now I've got no time to put the usual stuff down here.
So yea like I totally have this giant field where I've been collecting them, and now I just give them out to people who drive by and stuff...

No, I'm talking about the badges vadges of course. Llama vadges. Yea.

I've always hated these damn things. It might have just been the contrarian in me, but I thought (and still think) my reasons were legitimate for the most part. I mean, it was just deviantart trying to capitalize on something the internet had previously made popular, much like the trollface thing they did later. This site wasn't even the first to do llamas.

Then I was like "now these kids are just throwing them out to whore their pages, and try to get stupid ones with capes and shit. Goddamn people are stupid."

...but then, and for the longest time, I realized they had purpose beyond the nonsense mentioned above, but I still wanted to be above using them. Like ever.

I'm talking about social purposes though. They're like a way to tell people "I was on yo PAGE, son!" without leaving a comment or a favorite. (Come to think of it... that's kind of the opposite of social, but hear me out.)

Then the other day, I kind of found another use for them. They're like another "tier" of interacting, that is less useful than both a comment and a fav, but better than a view.

I was on this guy's page, checking out his gallery and stuff right? His art was decent, and he'd put a lot of effort into his page, but it wasn't really the type of art I liked to see in my inbox or favorites folder. That isn't to say it was Sonic, MLP stuff, or porn, I just have a lot of shit flooding those two folders already (I'm trying to reserve space for buddies and art gods). So what do I do? Leave a comment? No, I'm far too socially awkward for that, here's a llama instead.

I mean, what was I going to say? Your art is decent, but I don't really like it enough to favorite or add you to my watch? I mean, a favorite and a watch literally take two seconds of my time, maybe even less than giving the llama, but that's not the point. Some people might feel bad about that shit if they read into it, and I'd prefer to encourage in cases like these. I know people comment/praise without doing any of this anyway, like all the time, ever since the site spurned forth into existence from $pyro the Jarkoff'$ loins, but some of us freaks out there can't help but read between the lines sometimes... and when I say sometimes, I mean frequently in situations that don't even matter. So for people like us, I'm glad I figured this llama thing out.

Once I started, I couldn't stop giving them out. I went around to random deviant pages, giving them llamas, for like twenty-three and a half minutes. It was like a new liking system that had no recordable effect on my profile. Liking, Digging, and Upvoting were fun again.

-"Does this guy deserve a llama?"

-"No, it's all MLP porn, and done in MS Paint."

-"How about this chick?"

-"Yes, for with her improvement over the years, I can sense her passion and yearning to express herself as beautifully as she can, like the beautiful human being that she is... she's just not that terrific at it yet. So here's a llama.

These llamas they're... they're freaking perfect. Nobody knows what the fuck to think when they get a llama, so there's not much they can read into. I like to imagine (especially with people new to the site) that they're just sitting there thinking "why the fuck is someone giving me a llama?"

As they learn more, they can think this someone either did it to get a llama back, to "trade visits," to show approval of the page, to induce anger, or that this certain someone has a bot running that throws out hundreds of them (along with favs/watches) every day. *Corvalian glances in the direction of one of this site's daily front-page horror artists*

*Ahem* Anyway...

They're not even going to know, and that's the beauty of it. All those possibilities will just get jammed up in their brain, to the point where they won't even care to validate llamas with a thought anymore (like I did for so long). 

...but you know most of them will still totally look at my page after I give them one. That's the socialness, that's what it's all about, man. The circle of life and shit. Now who wants a fucking llama? You might just get one whether you want it or not, motherfuckers.

Oh, how is this a complaint? Fine, I'll tell you how! I'm pissed off that I've betrayed my previous values of boycotting and despising llama badges. I've become everything I've ever hated! :crying:

With that, I'll leave you with one of my all-time favorite quotes, from one of my all-time favorite movies:

You either die with loathing in your heart for other human beings, or you live long enough to see yourself find joy in their stupid bullshit.
-Sheriff Man-E-Faces in "This Country is For Old Men"

I can't decide which is worse. :no:

:iconindigodeerplz::iconsaysplz:This is about what the fuck llama badges are for... I think. Anyway, where the teal deer badges at?

Anti-Compliance... Complaint: I went to a comedy show last week with some friends, and they wouldn't comply with my demands to shut the hell up the whole show. I asked them three times if they came to get drunk and talk, or if they came to see a damn comedy show, but they kept talking. We could have done that for a lot cheaper at home.

Bogus Praise: Dude this is awesome! It's Friday and I'm so... sober? and sitting at home, on the internet, alone? Then, why does my writing make it sound like I'm drunk... or high? No, no, no, none of this adds up at all. I'd better inspect my environment.
I guess I'd better get this out of the way first:

In before "ermahgerd, yet another tumbling complaint/dead whores/fema-hitlers/antisocial justice warriors/etc."

...because this complaint ain't even really about any of that! So I hope those of you who think you know all about teh lurkingz of complaintz will find this somewhat original... but probably not (I know you too well, TOO WELL!)

Okay so this all started back in like March/April when I was in contact with my school's academic advisors about what classes I still had to take. "You still have to take an upper division writing course" they had said.

To which I replied "Is there one you can recommend that is most relevant to my major?"

"How about this one?" They said.

"Okay why the hell not" I said... as I signed up (and totally not to their faces).

Flash forward to the semester starting a few weeks ago now, and I'm in the class. It's a class about writing for "new media" as it's called... and we even spent part of the first day discussing what this new fangled "new media" was and what constituted "old media."

All is well and good, at first. My only gripe with the class up to this point is that it contains a few too many hipsters for my taste. To be fair, they all seem like perfectly nice people, and I'm far from becoming the god of fashion sense that this comment might imply, so I harbor no ill-will towards them. It was just a very observable fact, however, that they were very-much hipsters... like stereotypically hipster to a freaking T (whatever that means).

So everything was good, and I actually found the subject matter fairly interesting since I apparently have spent a lot of time working with this "new media" stuff already, and I didn't even know it!

That was until... tumblr!!1

Apparently many of our assignments (maybe even more than 50%) of them are going to be turned in... on tumblr blogs. So that meant I finally needed to figure out how to make one.

At first I was just like "Well, I knew it was only a matter of time before I made one, I might as well get it over with and try and learn something," but then upon struggling with its... horrible, horrible simplifications, I realized I'd become the equivalent of a 90-year-old man trying to use the internet for the first time in his life.

To be fair to myself though, it isn't because tumblr's interface is too complicated, it's because it's too far in the direction of the opposite of complicated. Its like its creator(s) were just like "we're literally only going to have like three things to click on at any given time, it'll attract all the old, non-tech savvy people" and instead they somehow ended up with all the stupidest young people (I'll get beaten up for that).

I've sat there with it, trying to figure out how to do all the things that a fucking social website is supposed to let you fucking do for god knows how long now. You know, the usual shit like comments, username branding, forums (maybe), emoticons, browsing while not logged in, searching more than one fucking word at a time, timestamps and dates for posts, etc. etc. etc!! All of it, gone. They done changed the game, but in the worst ways possible. It's like taking the game of chess and degenerating it into two people just kicking each other in the balls.

All that other shit people complain about with Tumblr? I haven't even seen it from the source yet. I can't even fucking get that far. How that level of delicious, delicious drama is even happening on this Fisher-Price-esque, turd of a website is beyond me. People can't even comment, how the hell can they start yelling at each other over being "shitlords" that don't respect women's rights?

Then how do you know it's full of stupid people, Mr. Corvalian? Well I don't, in truth. Although I can say that the content I've seen spill out of it, onto the rest of the internet, has been incredibly stupid.

To top it all off, when you make an account it makes you "follow three blogs." Well first-of-fucking-all, I can't really call most of this shit a blog. When I think of blogs, I think of shit people actually write, not a bunch of three-framed animated gifs of complete bullshit. Examples

Second, I don't know anyone on the site, why would I want to watch their "blogs?" Can't you let me lurk and figure shit out before I start watching people? Apparently not, because I saw no way to skip this step.

THEN~! As if this complaint weren't already long enough (blame tumblr, not me!) it gave us trouble in class. Instead of having us use a site that actually makes sense to people, like google blogger or something, our instructor (or whoever is in charge of the class's decision to use tumblr) decides we're going to try and force tumblr to work for our purposes. Which means signing up for something called "Disqus" (because naming your business after a word you spelled wrong is so edgy and cool, rite guyz?) which apparently is just a huge hassle-of-a-comments-bar that you embed into your tumblr page yourself.

We literally then spent the entire class period on Thursday trying to make Disqus work for everyone. The process involved opening up the HTML code for our tumblr pages, which we had to access in a roundabout way, and then pasting code from the Disqus website (which it gives you only after you sign up with them too) into the middle of it and hoping it works with whatever god-awful theme people in the class might have already added to their pages.

Mine worked right away, because thankfully I decided tumblr as a website didn't deserve the time I might have spent on "kewl cuztomisashuns" to make it look nice. Unfortunately, the instructor still had to spend the entire class period supposedly helping people that did.

I just don't get it, why are people using this site? What is going on that I'm not seeing? Especially when it comes to artists. I know of at least one artist who says she likes tumblr better than deviantart because she gets more feedback. ARG!! HOW ARE YOU GETTING FEEDBACK WHEN THERE ARE NO COMMENTS!?! :frustrated:

My conclusion is that there must actually be comments flying around everywhere on the site somehow, but for some reason the site doesn't have them built-in, or tell you how to build them in yourself. How is this intuitive for anyone? This makes no goddamn sense and I'm literally a technologically challenged, 90-year-old man now. I've become everything I've ever hated, and it's all tumblr's fault.

:iconindigodeerplz::iconsaysplz:Tumblr is an oversimplified, rotting, pile of aborted fecal matter, and I hate it.    
Wouldn't it be funny if I wrote such a long complaint, and didn't include this? The answer is no, no it wouldn't! You bastards know who you are, and I have half a mind to start a challenge to raise awareness for TL;DR's!

Anti-Establishment Complaint:"The Man" is constantly getting me down. Even if I wasn't employed right now, "The Man" would take the form of my school and still find some way to stick it to me. He's such a bastard.

Bogus Complaint: I had a specific shirt in mind today that I was going to wear, but upon searching for it I discovered it was dirty. During my search though, I found an even better shirt to wear that was clean, so I ain't even mad.
I was wondering lately what the basic advantages were to using a program like Zbrush over a program like Maya. I know a lot of professionals use both, but when would they prefer one over the other?

I ask because I'm in an art program in school right now that is primarily teaching Maya. I'm thinking about trying to learn Zbrush on my own time, but I would like to determine how much I may use one over the other, primarily if I was working in the video game industry.

Thanks in advance to anyone who can answer this.

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Add a Comment:
IceLaws Featured By Owner Oct 11, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
cool art btw :icondancingjesusplz:
Corvalian Featured By Owner Oct 11, 2014
thank you :D
IceLaws Featured By Owner Oct 11, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
AYE :d
Maj0rMareMolester Featured By Owner Sep 14, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
I have to spam message this. Forgive me Corvalian-san.

I've aparently already given you a llama. I was going to re-gift you but it's impossible.
Corvalian Featured By Owner Sep 15, 2014
dieliala Featured By Owner Sep 14, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
-singing- I came here to thank you for the llama~

llama cancanllama cancanllama cancan 

Llama jump chasing llama 3D Llama Badge chasing llama again 
Corvalian Featured By Owner Sep 14, 2014
My god...
dieliala Featured By Owner Sep 15, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Come~ dance with us you must. uwu

Go Yoda 
Corvalian Featured By Owner Sep 15, 2014
You can't make me!
(2 Replies)
graceyanneiseki Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for the llama! I gave you one in return. :iconteheplz:
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